Of Mice and Chickens
by Persiana13
Summary: One Shot. Blue Beetle and the League encounter another weird dimension, and it encounters them, too. Insanity Ensues! Takes place in the DC Persiana-verse.


**Of Mice and Chickens **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos_

**Due to the controversial nature of the original posting, I have decided to resubmit this work with more content. Thank you. **

One Shot 

Ted Kord, the brown-haired, blue costumed hero dubbed the Blue Beetle, was busy working in the lab with Skeets. The two had been working out the quirks of the inter-dimensional device, and did not want to have a repeat of last time. (1)

Skeets looked at the machine,

"I believe it is ready."

Blue Beetle smirked,

"Good, let's give the others a presentation."

**Later… **

Having set up the device in one of the training rooms, Blue Beetle addressed several League members. Among them were Superman, Batman, Diablos, Flash, Wonder Woman, Persiana, Tigra, Miss Marvel, Sentry, Wonder Man, Fire, Ice, Booster Gold, and Guy Gardner. Skeets hovered over near Booster, and Beetle explained,

"After countless hours of working-."

Guy shouted,

"Boring!"

Farrah rolled her eyes and back-kicked the red-headed Green Lantern in the groin, knocking him over. Ted cleared his throat and continued,

"As I was saying, after countless hours of working out the bugs, I think we can safely view other dimensions while not exposing ourselves to any danger whatsoever."

Batman folded his arms, unconvinced,

"I heard that before."

Blue Beetle cleared his throat nervously,

"Now, I am going to turn on the device."

Booster raised his hand,

"Shouldn't we make out our wills before you do this?"

There was a snicker from the crowd. Beetle ignored his friend and turned on the device.

As the lights flickered on the device, the window to the dimensional device began to show a dimension where everyone was a were-cat. There was a were-lion Superman, a were-leopard Wonder Woman, a were-cheetah Flash, along with a few others. Tigra and Persiana immediately drooled and had to be held back by several of their teammates.

The second dimension showed a dimension where everyone was a undead zombie. Wonder Man made a comment about it being like a zombie movie he starred in. Many of the women wretched at the sight of Zombie Superman eating a corpse. The Man of Steel tugged on his cape and said they should go to something else.

Guy thought to himself,

_This isn't half bad, for the nerd. _

He then noticed some cherry soda that Booster had put under his seat. Smirking evilly, the Green Lantern made a construct of a stretchable hand, slithering underneath the seats and grabbing the cheery soda cup. With a mighty thrust, the cherry soda was thrown into the machine.

Suddenly, the machine started to smoke. Beetle yelled,

"Michael, why did you throw your cherry soda at my machine?"

Booster raised his hands in defense,

"No way. I learned my lesson."

Guy snickered to himself. Unfortunately, Batman caught him. Picking up the arrogant Lantern, he glared,

"What did you do that for?"

Guy shrugged,

"I was bored."  
There was a brilliant flash, blinding everyone in the room. As the light subsided, the League noticed about seven or eight human sized mice, standing on their hind legs, wearing all black, like ninjas. They were wielding various ninja weapons, and looked befuddled,

"Was it another trick by those samurai chicken again?"

The leader looked and gasped,

"By the soul of Mickey Mouse; cats!"

Tigra and Persiana were instantly drooling at the sight of the mice. The lioness looked at her sister,

"Greer, are you suddenly getting hungry?"

The former Avenger nodded, a slightly deranged look in her eyes,

"Oh, yeah. Big time. I think I just had my food dreams come true."

The leader of the mice ninjas shouted,

"RETREAT!"  
Throwing a smoke bomb into the room, the League was coughing up smoke as the ninja mice tumbled out of the room. The felines, regaining their senses, bolted after them.

Miss Marvel rolled her eyes,

"This is exactly why I'm a dog person."

Just then, there was another emergence in the portal. This time, about seven or eight human sized chickens, wearing samurai armor, came through. They all had dreadlock wigs on, and were speaking English, but in a slightly Caribbean accent. The leaders said,

"All right, men. Dose ninja mice are around here. Find dem and chop dem up."

One of the samurai looked at Superman,

"Hey, mon. You see dose ninja mice around here, mon."

Several screams were heard, as the ninja mice were fleeing,

"THOSE STUPID CATS ARE GAINING ON US!"  
Farrah looked inside and saw the chickens. She stopped herself from chasing the mice and grinned,

"Hello, fried tenders!"

The leader shoved Superman out of the way,

"Who you callin' fried tender, furball?"

Farrah smirked,

"Wow, this gives a whole new meaning to the phrase Caribbean Jerk Chicken."

At this, everyone in the room collapsed. Everyone except Ice. Tora frowned in confusion,

"I don't get it."

Around this time, Hawkgirl walked in. The red-headed mace-wielder asked,

"Why is Tigra chasing a whole bunch of mice dressed up as ninjas?"

The samurai chickens all looked at Hawkgirl and said at once,

"MOTHER!"  
At this, everyone, including Batman, began cracking up hysterically. Hawkgirl was speechless,

"M-M-Mother?"

The samurai chickens all began huddling around the Thanagarian warrior, continuing their Mother chants. Shayera screamed and bolted, the chickens chasing after them.

Persiana composed herself, long enough to say,

"Someone, get a camera on Hawkgirl! This is definitely one of those moments!"

Flash sped away to get a camera and was filming the whole incident.

As the chases continued in the Watchtower, the ninja mice failed miserably to fend off Tigra and Persiana, who were wielding forks and knives, chasing down the mice. Flash was chasing the chickens who were chasing Hawkgirl all over the halls. Shayera threatened,

"WALLY, GET THAT CAMERA OUT OF HERE! ONCE I'M DONE SHAKING THESE FEATHER DUSTERS, YOU'RE DEAD!!!"

Needless to say, the two factions eventually collided into each other, and a huge fight spilled out. Superman and the other League members tried to break it up and separate the factions before they turned each other into mince meat.

John was holding back the ninja mice with his ring, and Guy Gardner was holding back the samurai chickens. Superman finally said,

"Now, what is this all about?"

The leader of the chicken samurai shouted,

"Those mice dumped cheese all over our bird seed!"

The leader of the ninja mice shouted back,

"Those chickens got birdseed all over our cheese!"

"That's a lie, mon!"

"No, it's true!"

The two leaders of the factions began shouting back and forth. It was not until Hawkgirl shrieked at the top of her lungs,

"KNOCK IT OFF RIGHT NOW!!! YOU'RE GIVING ME A HEADACHE!!!"

The chicken samurai shouted,

"See what you did, mon! You made Mother cry!"  
A majority of League members grinned and snickered at that. Shayera snarled,

"You're all getting it from me when this is over!"  
The Man of Steel decided to try and defuse this situation,

"How bad was it?"

The mice and chickens looked at each other and shrugged,

"Not really. I mean, it does taste good."

Wonder Woman asked,

"Then, why are you trying to kill each other?"

The leader of the chickens shrugged,

"They hit on my sister, mon."

One of the ninja mice replied,

"And what a catch she is."

The leader of the chickens roared,

"COME HERE AND DIE, MOUSE!"

Superman shook his head,

"That's it. You two can't let a little incident like that shatter everything you've worked for."

The leader of the mice and leader of the chickens thought for a moment and looked around. The leader of the mice said,

"We don't take orders from stupid humans."

The chickens nodded,

"Yeah, mon. Who do you think you are, mon? Tellin' us what to do?"

The mice roared,

"GET THEM!!"

The two factions then began banging on the force fields in an effort to break out and fight the League.

Blue Beetle walked out,

"Through them back in the machine!"

The two Green Lanterns encased the factions in emerald spheres and threw them back into the dimensional portal.

Batman glared at Booster Gold,

"Cherry soda is banned from the Watchtower. Now, you, Gardner, and Beetle clean up this mess, now!"

He walked away, picking chicken feathers out of his costume. Superman said,

"Now that this is all over…I'm getting drunk and forgetting this whole thing happened."

Flash pouted,

"Come on, Supes. We can put this on the Internet! Think of the money we could make."

Hawkgirl shrieked,

"GIMME THAT CAMERA AND DIE!"

Flash sped away, Shayera hot on his heels. Diana said,

"I think I'll have a drink too."

End of One Shot

(1) See Kidding Around.


End file.
